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Reflections

Essays from Kristy Forbes exploring PDA, autistic experience, parenting, identity, care, systems and the ordinary moments that shape family life.

My university days went like this.

Aug 12, 2021
I'm not an autistic researcher.
 
I am not a psychologist.
 
I take my hat off to my neurokin who are.
 
I am forever grateful to those who are engaged in research and academia, creating significant a
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She is so much more.

Aug 05, 2021
I often touch on how important it is to move beyond the generic support framework for our autistic children in the classroom. This includes a timer, dot points on the board and visuals.
 
Whilst these are really
...
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My PDA neurobiology.

Jul 29, 2021
I'm up at 5am this morning.
 
I have an appointment in the city and it's at a new address I haven't been to before.
 
This means that I get up early, google the address over coffee to check out some images
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We bring our children home.

Jul 22, 2021
We bring our children home
From failed systems
That have been enabled not to care
Not to care for our children
 
For us; when we were the children
We educate our children
And while trying to create a safe sp
...
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Where my grief came from.

Jul 15, 2021
This morning as I was barefoot walking through the garden, connecting with the earth, I felt a deep sadness come over me.
 
My instinct was to push the sadness away and to think of something else fast in order to
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School Trauma: Tuning into the language of behaviour.

Jul 08, 2021
 
 
For many of us, when we withdraw our children from school after prolonged challenges within that system, we expect that our children will begin to do better at home.
 
This isn't always so.
 
Our chil
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Appearances can be (so very) deceiving.

Jul 01, 2021
I'm a PDA autistic (Pathological demand avoidance).
 
This means that my social connectedness; my ability to engage with others naturally and to make eye contact gives the impression that I possess a higher level
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How I show up in friendships.

Jun 24, 2021
Hi! 👋 I'm Kristy, and I'm TERRIBLE at being a friend in the neuronormative sense.
 
I take months to respond to messages in my inbox, if ever.
 
Sometimes I say things that come across as blunt, forceful, of
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An invitation to lead with love.

Jun 17, 2021
Contrary to popular parenting advice, the time when our children return to the safety of our energy after being in trouble is not the time to lecture.
 
It is not the time to remind our babies why we were angry o
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Sensory overload and a social hangover.

Jun 10, 2021
Sitting here reminiscing about the good ole masking in social situations; days of extreme and intense anxiety for weeks, months leading up to events with other people.
 
The day would finally arrive and I’d be fr
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