Reflections
Essays from Kristy Forbes exploring PDA, autistic experience, parenting, identity, care, systems and the ordinary moments that shape family life.
All is Well in the Moment
When I REACT to my child in their most vulnerable moments,
I am called to explore within.
Do I have unmet needs?
Am I hungry, tired, thirsty, lonely, sad, scared?
Am I unidentified neurodivergent, therefore experienc...
PDA stops me in my joy, too.
Part of my PDA autistic expression is the inability to continue on with hobbies, projects and plans that excite me; that I really want to engage in.
.
The very act of planning has the potential to activate the threat respo...
The humour in the darkness
Yesterday, one of my closest and dearest friends panicked and cried as the result of my dry, expressionless, monotone humour.
.
We moved through it together, it was cleared up and we still love each other.
.
But, it reminded...
'Untouchable' love
I remember when I first found the courage to ask Mum if I absolutely HAD to kiss and hug every relative I was never able to recall that was visiting for the weekend.
Ugh.
I really wasn’t comfortable with being touched,...
This is not 'that' time
If, like me, your current lifestyle resembles a time where you weren’t doing so well,
It’s important to acknowledge that this is NOT that time.
There were a number of years of my life where I was unable to leave our fa...
Literal Solutions
At least a hundred times per week, I used to call my husband at work, sobbing or raging down the phone.
“..and then they did this!”
“..and they also did that!”
“..and I can’t do this anymore! I just can’t live like
...April is Autism 'Awareness' month, and it hurts.
April. Is. Hard.
(The following is expressed with gentleness and respect from an autistic person, and from one parent to another).
Part of my identity in this lifetime is that I’m a Mum.
I’m a mother of four daughters...
When the pressure is off
I’m sitting out on the balcony, really loving the breeze and the trees and the birds and I’ve been thinking about going home in four days.
How much I miss my little girls and my husband and my home.
This is the first t...
My Mother didn't sleep for years
This would have been 1979/80.
Mum bouncing me on her knee, you'll notice a familiar expression for many autistic bubbies on my face.
We're taking in so much information all of the time, all that sensory goodness and ba...
April is hard
April. Is. Hard.
(The following is expressed with gentleness and respect from an autistic person, and from one parent to another).
Part of my identity in this lifetime is that I’m a Mum.
I’m a mother of four daughters...